Aaron D. Wilson, 35, of South Hadley, MA, died unexpectedly of heart failure in his sleep on December 21, 2006. The much-beloved son of Maryann Wilson, Aaron was a tireless organizer, writer, leader, and activist for civil rights and social justice, who devoted his regrettably short life to improving the world. Aaron was born on April 27, 1971, in Marlborough, MA. From an early age, he demonstrated a sharp intellect and a deep distrust of authority and the status quo. His rebellious and often agitated demeanor confounded every kindergarten in Worcester, landing Aaron in the special education system, which unjustly wrote him off as a reprobate. Through his mother’s devoted advocacy and his own discipline and determination, Aaron learned to channel his prodigious energy and intelligence to productive ends, and he accomplished more in his thirty-five years than most people do in seventy. The anti-authoritarianism that caused so much trouble in his early life eventually became the basis for a sophisticated personal philosophy and a lifetime of service to others. At the age of 14, Aaron learned the value of hard work, and he was highly regarded at every job he held since--sometimes dirty, menial labor, sometimes even three jobs at a time. He held tremendous respect for working people and always maintained friendships with people from all walks of life. Upon his 1989 arrival at the University of Massachusetts in Amherst, Aaron, along with his good friends Brian Julin and Kai Price, founded the UMass Cannabis Reform Coalition (CRC), now the oldest active student drug policy organization in the nation. The CRC has garnered major media attention over the years, most recently for protests against overbearing police policy in the dorms, a trend that troubled Aaron deeply. An effective diplomat, Aaron forged a cooperative and productive relationship with local police in addressing campus drug use, and he continued to advise the CRC until his untimely death. After graduating from UMass with a major in History and a minor in African-American Studies, Aaron continued his education at Columbia University, earning two Master’s degrees, one in Social Studies from Teacher’s College and one with honors in Organizational Management. While at Columbia, he organized the Faculty Senate to challenge the academic objectivity of the Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA), directed by Joseph Califano. With Vinnie Kane, a firefighter who later died on 9/11, and his good friend Tom Leighton, he founded the Marijuana Reform Party of New York, which twice placed Tom on the gubernatorial ballot. Aaron also founded Columbia University NORML with friends he met there, and served as the personal archivist for the legendary Joe Baum, who revitalized the famed Rainbow Room in New York City. From 1995-2000, Aaron served as the Director of the Partnership for Responsible Drug Information (PRDI) in New York City, which provided a safe space for local social and political leaders to discuss alternatives to the War on Drugs. In addition to organizing and publicizing forums and other major events, he conducted extensive research in order to write and publish The PRDI Guide to Organizing Forums on Drug Issues and The PRDI Drug Policy Resources Directory for the Media, both landmark publications. While at PRDI, Aaron also helped to set up the Voluntary Committee of Lawyers, an association of lawyers and judges encouraging examination of the consequences of the drug war. After returning to Western Massachusetts in 1999, Aaron was active in politics both locally in Amherst, including as a member of the Amherst Town Meeting, and at the Statehouse. He provided support for college students organizing at campuses across the nation, and helped organize one of the first national leadership conferences of Students for Sensible Drug Policy. He served as the Chairman of the Board for the Massachusetts Drug Policy Forum, a lobbying group that fought for needle exchange, decriminalization, and access to medical marijuana, bringing experts and patients including his good friend Marcy Duda to testify at Congressional hearings. He also served on the Board of Directors for the Hampshire County United Way. Beginning in 2001, Aaron served as Executive Director for the Western Massachusetts Coalition for Occupational Safety and Health (COSH) in Springfield, where he trained union members in improving health and safety conditions. This included helping families of deceased Chapman Valve, Inc. employees get compensation for uranium ore exposure. He helped broker the Alliance for a Healthy Tomorrow, a joint effort of labor and environmental groups promoting safer alternatives to toxic chemical use. Aaron also served as a delegate for governor-elect Deval Patrick. For his service to the community, Aaron received the Micah Award for Springfield Community Activist of the Year and the Unsung Hero Award, among many others. Aaron loved science fiction and history, excelled at stretching a budget, and he appreciated all of life’s pleasures, especially music. He was an avid music collector and a passionate concert-goer. He was a strong believer in the education that comes only from experiences. Whatever he did, he did with gusto and an often irreverent sense of humor. But no matter how busy, he always prioritized the needs of family and friends. Aaron raised the inelegance of being human to an art form, which always brought a sense of ease to those close to him. Aaron is survived by his beloved mother, Maryann Wilson of Bennington, VT; his father, David Harper; his uncle and friend, Eric C. Wilson of Hudson, MA; his perennial sweetheart, Diana Ditmore of Amherst, MA; several other people who each actively considered Aaron to be their very best friend; many other devoted friends and associates, and two mischievous cats, Neko and Niko. He will be loved and missed dearly but not forgotten. A memorial service to celebrate Aaron’s life will be held at 1pm on Sunday, January 28, at the Campus Center Auditorium at UMass Amherst. To share your memories online, please visit http://RememberingAaron.org. The family requests that in lieu of sending flowers, donations be made in his name to a scholarship via this website.

I have too many stories about John to possibly post them all, or even really to pick one. John was the big brother I never had. He was there for the hangovers, before and after. He taught me responsibility. He taught me never to grow up. He taught me to cook, balance my checkbook, change the sparkplugs on a motorcycle and the oil in my car. But most of all he taught me that everything was fun, or at least it could be made fun if you just adjusted your thinking a bit. John, I didn't know how much I missed you...
always your little sister, Mara

145db of Tears for Fears

Yet another 'very John thing.' The last summer I lived at home I had a job working for a distributor of the Boston Globe. This involved - among other things - getting to a warehouse in the middle of an apartment complex 30 miles south of Boston at about 2am to meet the truck coming in from Boston with the papers, and getting them separated into routes for the paperboys and route drivers.

One morning a bit after 3 I was waiting - impatiently - for the truck to arrive when the phone rang. Desparately hoping the person about to call in sick or with car trouble didn't have 400 papers I was going to have to deal with I answered the phone.

A familiar voice asked "Is Neal Lastname working there?" to which I answered "Yes I am." The response was "Oh, yes you are eh?" followed by a loud and hearty exclaimation of "Baghead!"

And a click.

So I figure John is monkeying with his medicine, more than a little manic, and unable to sleep out in Amherst.

*BZZZT*

Less than five minutes later, I hear the unmistakeable sound of John's then-favorite cassette - Tears for Fears' Songs from the Big Chair - and I expect to see the Fiat or the Charger pull around the corner at any second.

But it just keeps getting louder.

Eventually, the beatup blue Fiat comes around the corner. I would never have guessed that you could get that much volume out of a Fiat. Did I mention that the warehouse was in the middle of an apartment complex. Or that it was around 3am?

...But even with the trouble I got in for having noisy friends, Shout never sounded quite so good.

Actually, I can feel it

Staying with loud, there was once a place called Andy's Pizza. It was just south of UMass Amherst's Southwest residential area.

They had a jukebox.

The jukebox had a volume control, and John had found it.

The jukebox also had the Quiet Riot single 'Cum on, Feel the Noize'

..and John had turned it up so far that you could.

We were encouraged to call for delivery.

-Neal/Corum

I remember.... ...Spock helping Jim fix a hole in his exhaust pipe with a Coke can and duct tape (hint: don't try this at home, at least not without nose plugs) ...and then teaching Jim how to drive standard in the Fiat in the local shopping center parking lot and having the cops stop by to see why people are doing donuts at 1 AM. ...aiming the windshield wiper fluid nozzle on the PVTA bus so it would squirt jaywalkers. ...the rallying cry "PWAH!" I miss you,John. - Johnna/Romana

Just one? Not possible. John was one of the best friends I've ever had, and certainly is responsible for some of the memories that are most important to me. Nailing the chairs to the walls of his apartment. How many people CAN you fit in the shower? Spicy food - so spicy your eyes were watering just from being in the kitchen. Scrambled eggs with cinnamon. And he didn't even EAT eggs then! John took care of me in so many ways, I always loved him in ways I could never express in words - not to him, anyway. I'm a little overwhelmed to be coherent right now, but reading everyone else's thoughts is bringing tears and smiles at the same time. Spock-wad, I will always have you in my heart.

I remember the aftermaths I always walked in after things happened. I remember walking in after a flour and water fight, I was asked to help clean up the house because some Parents were coming over the next day. And I see the mess and John looking at me and saying "Water and Flour make Paste!". I remember him writing to do lists on the wall in the kitchen, only to find out Dry Erase doesn't work on a painted wall. I remember him trying to teach me to cook. I was delared a cook when I started a fire boling water. And I learned the smoke detect is just another kitchen timer to let you know dinner was ready. He put cinnamon in everything and baking soda in tomato sauce so you didn't get heartburn. I remember him yelling at me from the driveway once. I had driven Mara's car back from Sunderland and he needed to move it. He got into the car and yelled loud enough that all the neighbors around heard "Jennifer, you are too short, I just hit my nuts on the steering wheel!" I remember the year I turned 21, he was off his meds. Neither of us remembered much of that summer. And more recently when his gift for Mara and Neal's baby arrived at my house for the baby shower I asked if it was safe for public consumption, he insisted it was... it wasn't. I will miss you John. Hloe!
-Jennifer/Daphne

He was never too busy to answer a question, even if the question seemed utterly clueless (as most of my computer questions were at the time). But what I remember the most was John's unerring sweetness--perhaps this isn't something he showed to most of the world, but I was privilaged to see this side of him. You knew that things affected him very deeply, but he didn't talk a lot about it--one word said usually left ten words unsaid, but he felt for everyone who was troubled. He made me feel grateful that he was my friend. Godspeed, dear friend.
Deb/Auriga

More than John, I miss a time when John was part of my life. I admit, I've fallen out of touch with 99 percent of the folks I knew from the terminal room, and from UMSFS. Sargon had to track me down through hints and google searches and coded comments on a public web page. I'm glad he did. In many ways, John was a "grown up" to me. I came to UMass way to young -- I couldn't drive when I got there. So naturally, having someone around who could not only drive, but drive a bus and help fill it up with milk crates to the savage cry of "Pwah!" was an important step up in the world for me. It was a really scary, crazy, wonderful and humbling part of my life. Many of you were part of it, and now 20 years have gone by, and I realize there's a hole in there where y'all used to be. If we all met in one giant room, let's face it, the first hour or so would be awkward as hell. Little pods of us that have kept in touch would gravitate to each other, and instead of the 40 folks who would decend on the campus center, there would 12 groups of 3 and a few of us sitting uncomfortably alone. All our conversations would start with "sooo.... how have hhe last 20 years treated you?" Of course, if Spock had been in the room, we'd all be doing something stupid within 10 minutes, and it all would have been fine. That was his gift. And no matter how far we've all gone our separate ways, the world will be that little bit colder now. Peace: Grot/Dave/
mail atsign nadigdotcom

John was always just a fun guy to be around. I'm pretty sure it was he and Steve Halpin who got into a tickle fight that wound up crashing into a full fish-tank. He started the one major food-fight I've ever been in at a public restaurant, it's a wonder we didn't get arrested. At the beginning of 1986, people voted for various made-up awards for members of our community. Here's what John received:

• Charisma-man of Cyber
• Most Relied Upon
• Most likely to be PWAH!ed for a McManus run-Spock (et le Starship Dodge)
• Best Arbitrator
• Best At Helping With Problems
Most Uplifting
• Daintiest Most Feminine Cigarette Smoking Movements.

Simply put, everybody liked John. He encouraged you to be true to yourself, not worry about tomorrow and enjoy the moment. The world desperately needs people like that. I'll always think of John when I see the sign for Dover, MA. Mitch/Rod
mdickerman at gmaildotcom

I guess I was one of the lucky ones who knew John pretty well in the early days. John and I ran the first "Pwah!" mission to get milk crates for him to move out of his dorm room in Spring 1985. That night we got 19 milk crates (stored them in my dorm room, woke up my roommate loading them in!) and a couch. The couch is the more interesting part.

John taught me to drive, in both the Starship Dodge and the Fiat. I remember when we were in the Fiat and I wasn't doing too well since it was a stick, and John told me to get out of the car and look into the vents just under the windshield wiper fluid spitters. I looked in, squinting, and saw a bumper sticker that read, "Are we having fun yet?" John just laughed in that way he had and took a drag from his cigarette.

I am pretty sure I was even with John during the aforementioned mission to bug Neil at work. John showed up at my house one night and said we had a mission. We didn't know Neil worked "for a distributor of the Boston Globe", so we first went into Dorchester to the Boston Globe headquarters, and they pointed us to the place on the South Shore where Neil actually worked. This probably coincided with John teaching me to drive the Fiat.

Then of course there were the various McManus runs in the middle of the night, which reminds you just how tough it is to find an all-night place out there. I wish I could remember them better, but the middle of the night isn't the best time for forming long-term memories. But I remember they were a lot of fun.

I think of John whenever I hear "Urgent" by Foreigner - it was like a theme song for him. He often had the boombox in his car cued to it waiting for just the right time. Sometimes the right time was just cruising through some small town in the middle of the night on the way back to Amherst.

John always seemed to see the best in everyone, and every situation, which is certainly something to strive for.

Ted/Kismet
tcorning at comcast.net

Too many - the Yamaha from hell that we assembled down to the last bold in my garage -broke off the stud and tore it all out of the frame and did it all on a new frame in 30 minutes...

The starship (if you have to ask...) in my garage kitty-corner because it wouldn't fit any other way as we did a front brake/rotor job on it in mid-winter...

And the computer center --- "What does THIS button do?"

Damn. There's gonna be a big hole in the world...

Peter deFriesse

As many other posters have indicated there are so many stories to post about John. To this day I still chuckle about his cleaning techniques.  Brian: "John lets go brew some beer" John: "Need to clean the house"  Brian: "Sigh ok" John brings in leaf blower and opens front door, blows all the the dirt out. John: "All clean lets go brew some beer"   John's other events that make me laugh is how he forgot about his potato in the microwave. I think he wanted to find out the explosion point for the potato. To this day I think the show Mythbusters was based off of John Ponte's antics. Finally, helping John and Mike Nagle remove some fence posts via his "little pickup". He tied a chain around the posts and pulled. To this day I have never seen Mike Nagle wife go from calm to enrage so quickly. I was thoroughly impressed albeit not all parties that day were ;)   John we fell out of contact but in the short period of time that we knew you, you left a life time of memories. We do miss you!   Brian/Deb

I was very fortunate to know John through the years - I spoke to him last in July as he was helping me remotely diagnose whether or not I had blown a head-gasket in my Saturn. "Do you see any Chocolate Milk???"

One of John's many gifts was his ability to find fun and humor in any situation as a way of connecting to the world, and he brought everyone he met some happiness as he did so. There's a lot I want to remember and preserve about John (including one of his favorite pictures), and its going to take time to write. Knowing John's sense of humor, I think he'd prefer any kind of memorial to be punctuated with the humor and smiles he brought to so many people. So this one's for you, John...

Requiem For A Baghead
- Jim/The Shadow

Wow reading these over brings back so many memories!!!! I so remember Peanut butter pizza Receiving a bag of black powder in the mail... with nothing but a note saying spaghetti sauce Exploding Toilets Heating your Apartment with the steam from the shower Spock finding so many of the props for Rocky So many memories. The world isn’t quite as bright without him in it.

Just because reading these has made me think of more, and more, and more....fixing the mini-buses for Community Homes, in February, in the dark and freezing cold. PWAH runs of all kinds. (I still have some of those milk crates, 20 years later. How messed up is that?) Evil Vulcan Cleanser. (Kids, don't try this at home!). More recent memories - bathtub sized martini glasses. His unwavering hospitality. I have no photos of him, though. Not one. If anyone can rectify this, send me email at alyxx at pantherhawk.net. Also, Nick (Shadowspawn), Jeremy (Frodo) and I (Archer) will be meeting at a local pub tonight, 7:30 - 8:00ish PST, to hoist a few in his memory. If you are in Seattle, feel free to join us at the Kells. If you are elsewhere, lift a glass at the same time, please, if you can? Thanks. Baghead, you might be gone, but you will never be forgotten. You are the big brother/bad influence/best friend that we all needed, and I am only sad that we weren't there when you clearly needed us. Does that thing really have a sewing machine engine?

2am. Orchard Hill P-lot. My car is dead as a stone, which for my car isn't unusual. This guy I barely know from the computer says he's gonna fix it. No problem. So we wire it up to the Starship. Boom! Sparks fly everywhere. The cables turn red hot. My battery starts spewing gas. John yanks the cables off, leaps in the Starship and throws it into reverse. We both stand away and watch the acid gas slowly ooze from my battery. We've almost destroyed both cars. Including. I mean. It's the Starship. So what's the reaction? We laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. We laugh the next day. The next week. The next year. And when I finally caught up with him last year, we laughed about it some more. That's my image of John. Laughing at the absurdity of it all. Kathy formerly Lew aka Lerrys/Argrath Dragonspear of confer, kathygnome at kathygnomedotcom

Photos: I have a couple - just two, maybe three - will scan and post a link... Peter

I had the extreme fortune of living next door to John the past several years. Since both he and I worked at home and tended to bury ourselves in our computer rooms, I probably never got to know him as well as most of you - my loss - and certainly never saw the John who dumped flour over your head or gave you a shower with a garden hose in the middle of the kitchen. He was a wonderful neighbor and a good friend, always helping me and my 2 kids with whatever we asked, and more. He taught my son how to drive a stick shift - not in the legendary Fiat, but is his most recent mode of transportion, a Ford F150. Thank you all for your commentaries, which have comforted me and I am sure will do the same for his family. I will make sure they see this, and will try to find some way to "include" those of you who cannot come to the memorial in that service.

Photos (That was quick):
Oddly, despite my reputation back then, NONE of these photos are shot by me. As far as I know the first time John ever went to Colorado was for the wedding of Peter Krotkov and Amanda Faut. The "InTux" shots are from that trip at that wedding. The garage shot was made by Janice when John showed up during one of my FreeBSD installations on "new" hardware. He made many helpful suggestions, but as I had no explosives I was unable to implement them. The lawnchair shot was shortly afterward when we decided if explosives were not available, we'd hit the next best thing -- the beer supply... I'm VERY lazy now that I've retired from Hell (also known as OIT) so this is a simple dirlist: http://www.people.umass.edu/peter/Spock/
[Editors note: the photo above is a link from Peter's collection. Thanks!] Peter pdefriesse{at}yahoo.com

Nick, Jeremy, and I are planning to fly out for the memorial. I've spoken to Jay (John's brother) once, briefly, and he said "midweek" - if anyone has more complete information, please let me know ASAP so I can grab plane tickets. Thanks Alyxx

I woke John up - not hard to do when you sleep 22 hours per day - late one Wednesday and told him he was needed urgently to be best man at a wedding in Boulder - the following Friday. A quick call to Regnad to borrow plane fare and he showed up at our place wearing full Vulcan attire, including the ears, in plenty of time for the wedding. Not long after that adventure he moved to Boulder and occupied the living room for a good long time. This morning I remembered these very Ponte-like adventures:

• the story of him cleaning the toilet with EVC when the Lizard King flicked a burning butt into it
• cleaning toasters in the shower. He later found that inconvenient and switched to using the dishwasher
• the folks at Head Sports were much to dreary so he began the morning ritual of dumping the left over decaf, replacing it with the sludge from the previous night's regular coffee, and firing up the burner. Very much a Spock maneuver.
• in either the shuttle craft (the fiat) or Regnad's old 626 we would go out for a drive. He'd roll down the windows, blast 'Big Bottom', and operate the windshield wipers continuously. For unknown reasons he found it fascinating to fill the wiper reservoir with French Whore perfume, whatever that was. Folks sure noticed.

Yoda
pete at nic.umass.edu

Update from Colorado - The memorial is early Thursday morning.

I never knew John very well, but he was nothing if not memorable. When I first showed up on Confer, he was one of the ones who went out of his way to make this clueless dweeb feel welcome. I remember hearing about his struggle with depression, and finding that an interesting contrast with his outwardly happy-go-lucky nature.
I don't think I've really thought about him since leaving the Valley, but now, hearing these stories again 20 years later, I miss him.
Farewell, Spock-wad.
...
-Chip Olson (Castellan).
ceo at thsi dot org
http://ceo.livejournal.com

Damn, I almost forgot the gravy. Jim and I used to have a bunch of people over for dinner every year on Xmas day (The Dinner for Misfit Toys, naturally). One year, we ran out of gravy for the turkey. Not to worry, John was there. He raided every cupboard and every nook of the fridge for anything brown that would pour or melt that we could put in the gravy pan. When he added the bottle of Guinness, it was just right..... - Johnna
jyklukas at virgil dot com
http://www.jykboxes.com

Neal said I have to post this one: I don't remember what scheme John had come up with this particular day, but I said "John, you have lost all remaining marbles!!!" John just grinned that grin at me and ran out the kitchen door. I followed, afraid of what he might get up to. He ran out to the garage, opened the driver's side door of the Starship, reached under the seat, and ... you guessed it - pulled out a bag of marbles. "See? said John, "I know exactly where my marbles are!" Only John would have thought to have his marbles so conveniently at hand for just such an occassion.

As noted above, John could always be counted on to help. He was also pretty good at getting other people to help him...

Which is how I wound up helping Doug "Jim the Lizard King" move back to southeastern Massachusetts one afternoon. John simply arrived and announced that we had a mission.

I missed the part where he should have mentioned that he wasn't coming along.... I really didn't know Doug all that well before that two and a half hour (each way) trip.

-Neal

What a loss for all of us, and what a sad way for us to find each other again. In many ways john/spock managed to provide a locus for our community. That he manages to do so in both death and life says much about the people that met him along the way. I'm more than glad to merely remember him for his willingness to take time out of his life to help us newbies find our way around umass and elsewhere.

I didn't know John that well, but I remember him as a funny, cool guy. Twenty years after I first showed up at UMass, I now work there (yikes!) and every time I find myself in the Blue Wall I think back on the old coffee breaks and wonder what became of all those old friends; this wasn't, alas, what I'd hoped to hear. This is very sorry news indeed. )-:

-suzanne
(at chem.umass.edu)

John and I went to the same high school (Dover Sherborn Regional), though John was several years older than me, and I didn’t know him in hs, I did know his younger brother, Jay. As a newbie freshman at Mt. Holyoke I, naively, thought that high school was far away and no one would know me there. Imagine my surprise, shortly after discovering confer, having someone verify he was, in fact, from DS by providing the students’ nickname for the vice principal! That’s how I met John. I didn’t know John as well as some of you, and wasn’t a part of the cyber crew for long, but I still have some milk crates John helped me acquire too! Those suckers are too useful to get rid of! I swear that for the longest time I didn’t really know (or want to believe) that taking milk crates was illegal. Yes, despite the notice printed right ON the milk crate! And I remember that gravy! I was just thinking about that! Someone said that John kept in touch with everyone and brought people together. This is definitely NOT one of my strengths. I can’t think of a better way to honor his memory (other than going on a PWAH run for milk crates) than to get back in touch with old friends, both in and out of this community. I have already started reaching out to old friends. Thanks for everything, John. You are dear and will be missed. Heather (Carrie)
hcoon at wideopenwest dot com

I remember going to the Northampton DPW for my license test to drive a bus, which was taken in one of the green and orange UMass school buses which the PVTA used to teach drivers. One of the other drivers was a guy I sometimes talked to waiting for chem lab in the morning. After we both passed the test, I started talking with him the next time I saw him in the hall waiting for the lab to open, thinking it cool that we now knew each other as drivers as well as engineering students. "Hold on, I need some nicotine..." as he reached into a pocket for a Camel. He contemplated it for a moment, then ripped off the filter. Once he'd had a drag off it he visibly relaxed. "So, do you ever use 'confer'?" "Yep" He grins. "Hi, I'm Spock." "Hi, I'm Axeman." and we laughed like crazy at the weird synchronicity of it all. From then on every time I saw his typed out "Flick...Puff...Ahhhh" I always stopped to wonder if he'd stopped to tear off the filter first. --Glenn

There is so much to remember, and so many people posting comments here that I'd make myself. I met John online first, when I was using Twinkle (chat program that preceeded Confer), and eventually in person when I was out visiting UMass Amherst. I had a lot to learn about life when living around Amherst, and as funny and prank-filled as he was, John also filled the role of big brother to me for a while. It's because of him that I fix my own cars as much as possible, and because of him that I ride and fix a motorcycle. I keep a version of Evil Vulcan Cleaner under the sink. Once, we were on some mission, starting the drive from Boston back to Amherst, and had stopped for gas for the Starship. We were about to climb into the car, and he looked at me, said "I'm tired", and held up the keys. I didn't get it. He said "You're driving. I'm tired." My brain boggled; this was a level of trust that I had done nothing to earn (and probably quite a lot to never earn)... That drive is something of a blur; I was trying to be careful, John was either cranking the music up louder, urging me to go faster ("Go on! Push down on the gas or I'm putting my foot over there and pushing down on it for you!"), grabbing the wheel and shaking it, or telling jokes and trying to get me to crack up laughing. I'm surprised we arrived alive, in one piece, and unticketed. As with us all, I will greatly miss him from this world. joelll (at genericdomain.net)

Here's a picture I took of John while we were still at UMass together. I remember him telling me that of all the places he'd worked on campus, he never felt more comfortable and content than when he would spend time at the stables taking care of the horses. He was happiest when he got the rare opportunity to ride, and I happened to come across him during a winter day, when he had 'borrowed' a moment with the mounted division of the Boston Police who were getting ready for a patrol at the Quabbin.
- Jim/The Shadow (jsb at virgil dot com)

One story John himself told me about was installing a telephone in the oven in his apartment in Sunderland...so he could have a "hot line". Maybe someone reading this can fill in the details. Something also about mounting the couch half-way up the wall... I'm overjoyed at the outpouring of stories and thoughts here. Many of us haven't seen each other for nearly twenty years. I got together with Nick, Alyxx and Jeremy tonight. It's good to meet again. Really good. I will be attending the memorial service in Colorado. If anyone needs help with anything in regard to it, just ask. Tim aka Kablosna Phantax
tboudreau at sun dot com

As the others I have many stories about John.... I *still* have some of the milk crates he pwahed. Last week I heard "Shout" by Tears for Fears.. that song always reminds me of the times John was driving for PVTA . He would crank that song and it seemed the whole bus would get into it. I havent seen John or any of you in over a decade. This sad news really shook me. John was a good man, always ready to help, and always making life interesting. Ellen/Natural Log
natural_log at verizon dot net

Very sad news indeed. John was a good friend, as well as source of mischeif and inspiration. He was the only person I have ever known who could catch a steel pot on fire whilest trying to boil water. John appeared in my life at a time when a dear friend from the old "CONFER" days had passed away. "CONFER" UMASS' early chat application. The funny part was, that most of the people using the old InfoTON 100 terminals in either the library or Grad Center were sitting within eyesite while using the system :-) A short story: John's FIAT was deader than a doornail at his place in Conway. I came over to assist in a "carbuerator"ectomy. After a couple of hours of painstaking diagnosis., John decides place the air-filter back on the top of the carb and procedes to douse the paper element with about about a pint of ether. He then has me turn the igniton and "pow" you could have heard the backfire and seen the flame from South Deerfield. After a couple of beers and some thought and possibly some spray-paint, it turns out he had a cracked distributor cap instead. Anyhow, John could always provide a smile when you were down, and thought not of his own wants. He will be missed. Matt Deloia
(Hodge Podge)

Wow. Now that I see your names, I have really begun to miss you guys. I wonder if this isnt a good time to think about planning some kind of reunion? Maybe in a year or 2 years time we would all have the money to travel to meet up...maybe John would have been amused by that. just an idea.....

So many things have been posted already, I have little to add. John taught me that everything could be fixed with duct tape, that even a bath tub could be set on fire, that umbrellas are meant to hold confetti, and that every thing (EVERY THING) can be made funny if you try - there is humor in every situation. I met John through Confer in 1985. He was one of my dearest friends for the next 21 years and will be with me always. He was the truest kind of friend. Every time I flew through Denver, John was there to greet me at the airport, even if only for minutes. Every time I received a cigar in the mail I knew that John had gotten a promotion or a new/better job. John threatened me with Captain Underpants gifts for my kids. I couldn't wait. I really love John. He will be sorely missed. But he would love the gift he gave us all. In his death, he brought us back together. Julie (Hansen) Balch - EVITA

Neal, Ryan and I will be flying to Colorado...

Wish I could--but my heart is there.

I'd love to hear more about what John was doing after college. I lost touch with him around 1985, but he has the distinction of being the last guy I dated before I started dating the guy I married (Hawkmoon.) I had a rule that I wouldn't date guys who smoked but I broke it for Spock. :-) Wendy
Dally at Myself Dot Com

Mandy here (yes, Peter K's first wife). I won't be making the memorial - I went back to grad school and am currently in medical school (yes, to be a real doctor). Gross anatomy doesn't stop for anything. I think John would understand. John came to my second wedding as well. After the ceremony, my husband and I went to get into the limosine to ride to the reception - and the limo was dead. In true Ponte fashion (yes, we have pictures), John drove his car onto the old historic church lawn and jump-started the limosine. While he was in a suit. No shit. A bright burning flame in a world of darkness has been extinguished when John left this earth. He was a beacon of kindness, laughter, humility, and friendship. Let me know if there is a memorial fund in his name. I'll burn a pot of spaghetti sauce in his honor this weekend. -Mandy (Nyssa/Pearls)

One other thing ---- I distinctly remember riding the bus routes when John was driving with "classical gas" and "long cool woman in a black dress" playing full blast. I still think of him when I hear those two songs.

Damn....by all the gods above this truly sucks beyond suckage. John was a great friend, bent over backwards to do anything to cheer you up. I will always remember how he smoked multiple cigs when he was upset. I will also always remember the 1st Rocky Horror Picture Show liveshow cast party at his apartment....how many people can one fit in a shower indeed. Having been working in the human services field with psychotropic medications for 19 years I have an inkling of what he was going through and the things those medications do to you. However he was always a trooper, I never heard him complain about it. John was one of many who reached out to a young, clueless (yeah I admit it), geeky kid who never fit in anywhere and brought him into an eclectic, dynamic, and sometimes manic crowd of people all of whom changed my life. I wish I had the money to come to Colorado for the memorial service, would love to see all of you again and pay my deepest respects to John. I hadn't seen him in a LONG time, and I wish that I had.....I think he would have been surprised, as I look NOTHING like what I did at UMass, just ask Neal/Corum. John was a great friend, a great person, and a truly bright spirit. I never heard anyone say a bad word about him. I will miss you Spock, and hope to meet you again someday.....until then, Live Long In The Light And Prosper........and at the next metal show I am at I will do some headbanging for ya, I think you'd be amused at that. :-) Jan Novak (aka Elric/Logan)
jmnovak at hotmail dot com

This is one of the last emails that John had sent me. (Madeline is my 10 year old daughter) From: ponte [at] indra.com
Subject: The Plan!
Date: June 20, 2006 9:41:23 AM PDT
To: sam.woolsey [at] gmail.com
Ok! Here's the plan: 1. Invite Madeline to come visit in Los Angeles. 2. Take her shopping on Rodeo Drive. 3. Go to an upscale clothing store. (The kind that has an attendant for the fitting room. 4. Have Madeline pick out an item, and go to the fitting room. 5. Wait 3-4 minutes. 6. Have Madeline yell, "Hey Dad! I'm in trouble! There's no toilet paper in here!" 7. Photograph the expression on the attendant's face and send it to me.

Just a few of the things I learned/experienced with my friend John. • He taught me how to return something borrowed in better shape than when I received it.
• He taught me how to save money and organize my finances.
• He taught my 7 year old daughter how to flick peas properly at the dinner table.
• He taught me that the proper instructional video for ANY plumbing project is “A Plumbing We Will Go” by The Three Stooges.
• He taught me how to fix a corn stove.
• He opened me up to the wonderful world of Unix.
• He taught me how to cook healthy food.
• He taught me that fixing a toilet can only be done properly after at least 3 pints of beer.
• He taught me how to plant a garden.
• He taught me that you can figure out just about anything with enough time and persistence.
• He taught me that whoopi cushion’s really do have a place in the workplace.
• He taught me how to make Kitty Litter Cake.
• He taught me how to vacuum the house with a leaf blower.
• He showed me how many Qualcomm sys admin’s would fit into a VW Bug.
• He showed me some of the most beautiful hiking spots on the Front Range.
• He showed me how to make a “Perfect Martini”.
• He taught me (through his own actions) how rewarding it is to lend a helping hand, no matter the size of the task.
• He once bought me an honorary Sys Admin “propeller” hat.
• He introduced my child to the wonderful teachings (which only brought dismay to the grandparents) of Captain Underpants. And he was Oh-So-Pleased to learn that “Squishy’s” ACTUALLY work. (ref: Captain Underpants)
• He taught me not to worry too much when every one of my conversations with him started out with phrases like “We need to leave the State”, “We’re gonna be in so much trouble”, “Do you have backup funds for bail money?”.
• He taught me how to turn a used toilet into someone’s office chair... TWICE!.
• He taught me and my daughter how to launch Krispy Kreme’s with the water balloon launcher.
• He taught me how NOT to get banned from entering my friends house with power tools.
• He taught me how to catch some air by launching an F250 longbed over speed humps at 65mph.

Most importantly, he taught me how to teach myself and how important it is to pass that knowledge on to the next generation.
I’m really going to miss him. After reading all these stories, I’m even more validated in my thoughts that John’s spirit will live in this world for many a year to come. He touched the lives of so many people and for him touching mine, I’m eternally grateful.
When I get back to LA, I’m eating at Paco’s Taco’s when I land. And for those coming to CO, if you have time, there is a Paco’s Taco’s in Idaho Springs (about 45min west of Denver on I-70) (John Frequently answered the phone as Paco himself.)

Thank you John for teaching me that golf is a lot more fun when played with a can of spam - rather than a golf ball.

I attempted to write some comments but I think I timed out talking to another friend of John's, Paul Krueger here in Colorado. I met John after he left Head Sports and joined Coral Systems. He had the Mazda about a week there before it got totalled. I lent him my car during that time to do some errands and that is how our friendship started. He returned the car with the gas tank full by the way. I got my first unix computer from John. He fished an old decommissioned sun server it out of a closet at Coral. I spent many a late night in that place with him. He bought a Bronco after the Mazda. It was a real turd and he poured money into it if I recall correctly. When he finally did start making some cash he leased and then bought the F150. We did alot of house moving in that F150. I think John probably moved everyone he knew in Colorado. We brewed beer together for a while and we persuaded him to spend come over to our house during the holidays for dinner. He did not celebrate the Hall Mark holidays. One of my memorable stories of John is he helped me to pull some old fence posts out in my second house. I was a bit naive and let him help. He pulled the first fence stump out with his Mustang and I had already worked on that stump so it came out easily. The second one was more tricky so he went for the truck. It shot out of the ground like a missile and proceeded down the good part of the fence smashing fence posts and pickets before stopping a couple of feet from my new installed air conditioner. He thought that was so funny. My wife was pissed. We now had 5 sections of fence to fix instead of 2. We were supervised after that. In John fashion he said we were a pint low so after calling in some additional troops and drinking alot of beer we fixed everything. He also retrieved a toilet from me so if some former sun employees were the benefericies of a joke with that, you now know where it came from. I also was a recipient of the Captain Underpants collection, the Gargoyles a gag on Hear no Evil, See no Evil etc. In this case however one has his finger in his ass, one in his ear and the other with his finger in his nose. When my son was born, John gave him a present of condoms, cigarettes and Jack Daniels. After reading the blog, I have learnt more about John. He never discussed his depression but I had figured it out a long time ago although it is now only being confirmed for me. I think he is free now.

Unfortunately I didn't know John well at UMass, but I do remember when he paid Graham Mitchell (Loki / Locarai) and I a visit in our apartment in Dedham MA in 1992. He taught us how to make beer battered seafood, then said his doctor had declared him disabled due to his depression, next he spoke of skinnydipping in the ocean with some girl he had just met, and ended with him ordering Graham to repeatedly punch him in the stomach as hard as he could, which Graham did. John didn't even flinch, he had a stomach of steel then. Andy Steinberg / Professor Nutto
andy at research dot umass dot edu
South Hadley MA

Neal & I would like to suggest a Coffee Break at the Blue Wall, the Sunday of Columbus Day weekend. It seems somehow fitting, as so many of us have memories of him there...

I met John a couple of years back while he was working at a startup company. I was working at a sister company and we had the opportunity to work together on a few small projects. The work went quickly but we spent hours just talking. We talked about ourselves, of course, but John also regaled me with tales of his pranks over the years (many of which have already been written about here). He was proud of them, and well he should be, given how elaborate some of them were. We also talked about his time at Qualcomm and Sun and how much he enjoyed the jobs and people. Unfortunately, there were problems at the startup where John was working and John left. I didn't see him again. For as short of a time as I knew him, I got to know him pretty well--or so I thought. I wish I had gotten to know him even better. He never mentioned the depression, for example. He was always upbeat and positive regardless of the circumstances surrounding his job. I didn't know him long and he made a great impression on me. I can only imagine how much he meant to those of you he knew for years.