Kirill Grouchnikov's Blog

JavaOne - what a cool, next-generation, Brazilian experience

• A lot of supposedly cool stuff (even had an entire track for that), that wasn't anywhere near being usable, useful, or cool for that matter.
• A lot of next-generation stuff, that will take at least 3-4 years to make its way into real-world enterprise applications (yes, it will take uncounted hundreds of millions of dollars for real systems to move from J2EE 1.3.1).
• A lot of cheap applause from Brazilian programmers (felt like a horde of puppets sometimes, but as long as people are happy...).
• An amazingly annoying Finch puppet (note the nice interoperability with the previous item). I guess its creator likes it, but who else in the JUGs? Even John Gage was forced to play along and listen to it. Next in line - the guy in the Duke costume (i was told that they worked in shifts). My picture was way out of focus. I'll be on my way to buy that HP camera real soon.
• A wonderfully disappointing track on desktop (i have attended at least 10 sessions and BoFs on this one), only to be matched by the shallowness of "Swing hacks" with stunning amount of typos, discrepancies between the code and the comments, and code style. But then again, i only got to #45. Nice to know, though, that a sizeable portion of Java 2D team has been working for three weeks on turning a non-existing application into an extreme looking one.
• An educating insight into Dolphin's future by Mark Reinhold. Unfortunately, he has asked me to refrain from putting the screenshots of his slides on the web, so i'll patiently wait (hopefully not too long) for his entry on the subject to put my 2c in.
• A stunning amount of James Gosling look-a-likes. Guys, seriously, the long gray hair may look fine on James, but not on you. Just shell out a few bucks and cut it. Really. Even set up a PayPal account, and i'll gladly chip in.
• A fair amount of nightmares when John Gage repeatedly tells me that I have only 58 hours left to make new friends. Only to be matched by the obnoxious behaviour of xfy's marketing guys. And may be by the amazing number of people who were actually willing to sit down and listen to that **** to get a t-shirt in the end.
• Speaking of xfy - the technical people couldn't even tell me why it's better than OpenOffice or MS Office. Well, why should i buy it exactly?
• And speaking of the pavillion floor - nice experience with one of the Sun's WebStart guys that couldn't answer my question (not an easy one) and then was apparently relieved when his shift ended. Didn't even finish the conversation properly, just looked the other way and started to talk with the next shift guy. Way to go!
• The naming convention for next Java products is OK, but can the marketing guys please stop? Pretty please? I know you have to show that you bring value to the organization, but how about enough? Not only did you make the slides look ridiculous, you even got your own people confused (Graham and Mark had contradicting points of view on the time of the next naming change). Pretty please, can you choose something and then let it live? Maybe you (the lawyers / marketing people) didn't attend the sessions, but even your own technical guys were making fun of you (indirectly) on each slide with "Java TM Platform Standard Edition" that replaced "Java".
• Had my own BoF attended by almost 18 people (but then again, it started at 19:30 on Wednesday, in the middle of the "Bash the next geek you see" party).
• And please! We know you are Brazilian. Heard it quite a few times. Brazil everybody (wait a few seconds for applause). Blah blah blah (notice that the audience is dozing off) Brazil (wait for applause). Rinse and repeat.

Comments

• One thing I found funny was the company that renamed itself to 'Seagull Software'. Maybe it's a midwest thing, but we use the term seagull to describe consultants where they fly in, make a lot of noise and crap on everything, then fly away. Now, would I name my company after that particular bird? Probably not.

  Posted by: jhook on July 02, 2005 at 12:21 PM

• I am looking at the picture and couple of things stood out - Didnt quite realize that one could bump into Java dudes around the artic circles in Siberia and, of course, set of Java jihadis in Libya, Sudan and Egypt :)

  Posted by: tchangu on July 02, 2005 at 04:38 PM

• That was supposed to be Alaska and not Siberia. And wait for the next year's round of small firearms firing each time the word "Sudan" will be mentioned.

  Posted by: kirillcool on July 03, 2005 at 08:05 AM

• Dude, what country are you from? We can applaud for you next year!

  Posted by: turbogeek on July 03, 2005 at 09:51 PM

• I swear to god, if i hear the word "cool" one more time, i'll put a gun to my head and pull the trigger

  Wow, next time you login at java.net you're a dead man then, given cool is in your username...
  

  Posted by: felipeal on July 04, 2005 at 01:36 PM

• Kirill--
  As you find errors in Swing Hacks, please submit them to the book's errata page so we can correct them in the next edition.
  Thanks.
  --Chris Adamson, co-author Swing Hacks

  Posted by: invalidname on July 05, 2005 at 04:43 AM

• Grouchnikov,

  I appreciated this blog...but couldn't help but notice the nice interoperability between your tone and your last name. It's just kind of funny.

  Posted by: tcowan on July 05, 2005 at 07:27 AM

• Appears like an honest blog - the truth can only be ascertained by appropriate
  experts. It is good to be able to speak your mind sometimes, considering how
  restrained one has to be fairly often. I wouldn't chip in for someone else's
  haircut though. There are more worthy causes that deserve support. The part
  about Brazil does appear honest, but there is such a thing as diplomacy. Notice
  how they applaud even Pres.Bush in some parts of this world? Your blog does
  sound honest, but couldn't help feeling you had a tiff with your spouse before
  writing it.
  

  Posted by: rsm0001 on July 05, 2005 at 09:16 AM

• rsm0001,
  No tiff there, it was written a couple of hours after she met me at the airport and we drove home. It was just curious to hear cheers every time the name of the certain country was mentioned on one hand, and frustrating to see the attempts to win the crowd using rather simplistic tricks on the other hand.

  Posted by: kirillcool on July 05, 2005 at 09:50 AM

• KirillCOOL,
  Your words sounds a little gelous to me, the brazillian people wasn't applouded 'couse they used simplistic tricks. They were 'couse they are a happy and enthusiastic people on one hand and 'couse they can produce real quality and effective software on the other hand. Or do you really think Scott Mcneally and John Gage said so much 'couse they wanna hear cheers ?

  Posted by: pizzandre on July 05, 2005 at 11:45 AM

• Kirillcool, the man behind this flag is one of the founders of SouJava and is responsable for the creation of a 18,000 member organization. It's a very impressive feat, don't you think ?
  By the way, it was the first time i've spent my time to read your blog.... this brazilian marketing stuff seems to work !

  Posted by: gilmar on July 05, 2005 at 12:41 PM

• gilmar,
  Each year 2 million Indians are graduated majoring in computer sciences (and there way more Indians than Brazilians at JavaOne). I work for a firm with about a 10000 Java programmers. 18000 out of 4.5 million is a quarter percent. This is by far not the largest Java community in the world.
  Pizzandre,
  It's the opposite way. By simplistic tricks i was referring to the lectors who tried to induce the applause each time they told the word "Brazil". Yes, they can produce real quality, yes they can produce effective software. Are they better at it then the rest of the world?
  It's all about politics. It appears that Sun tries to spin the work in Brazilian health field to show other governments that it can be done. Of course it can be done. But in this case the audience unknowingly played the part in much bigger play staged by some of the speakers.
  Do i have something against Brazilians? Of course not. Why should I? I wa just referring to the amuzing (and annoying) spectacle that has been unfolding before my very eyes for three and a half days. It could have well been India (strange that it was mentioned only once for sending 50 millions CDs with open-source software, but then - it didn't really fit Sun's theme of MS opposition), Russia or China. The next government that creates Java-based apps in their misitries will be undoubtedly loudly fanfared during the next JavaOne.
  

  Posted by: kirillcool on July 05, 2005 at 12:55 PM

• Ok, everybody can build a 2.3000k LOC system in 4 month with 30 people - 10/15 developers - (and open source it) and every country can have one guy making 18k others talking and sharing experiences about java ... So, just do it

  I'm not saying that they did it 'couse they are brazillian, but they are brazillian and they did it, so they diserve the cheers

  Posted by: pizzandre on July 06, 2005 at 04:56 PM

• You have shame of your country?
  We not!
  Brazil r0x...

  Posted by: eltonk on July 07, 2005 at 06:48 PM

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