Skip to main content

Talking Engineerese

Posted by davidvc on June 5, 2007 at 12:11 PM PDT

I was talking with my brother on IM last night and he complained about sotware engineers. He showed me a conversation between himself and an engineer. I thought it was a made-up joke dialog, to make his point.

But he
blogged about it today
, and said it was an actual transcript. OMG! Here it is in its full glory. Read it and weep.

AVC - (presenting plan and budget) Can you do this?

AB - Absolutely

AVC - Can you get it done by the due date?

AB - Yep

AVC - Can we get it done using this budget?

AB - Yes, could do

AVC - Can you get it done in this time *and* with this budget

AB - If you can get someone to work for free

AVC - So you can’t do this by yourself?

AB - Yes, I can

AVC - But not by the due date…

AB - I could…

AVC - But not with the other stuff you’re doing?

AB - Yes

AVC - Meaning no, you can’t get it done and do your other work too….

AB - Not without help

AVC - Which costs money

AB - Normally

AVC - So this current plan of you doing this by yourself by this date and with this budget won’t work

AB - Not without divine intervention

AVC - So when you said “absolutely”, you meant “absolutely not”?

AB - Absolutely