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Mr. Blogger's Neighborhood

Posted by davidrupp on December 31, 2004 at 3:22 PM PST

It's a newbie-full day in the blogosphere,

A newbie-full day for a blogger,

Here's a new blog.

Read my new blog.

It's a blogger-y day in this newbie-sphere,

A blogger-y day for a newbie.

Click my trackback,

Check my feedback.

I have always wanted to be a blogger

Just like you.

I've always wanted to play in the blogosphere

With you,


Let's make the most of this RSS thing,

Let's find some new aggregators to ping.

Blogging's so neat,

Thus I repeat:

Let me be your blogger.

Hello, boys and girls, and welcome to Mr. Blogger's neighborhood. I think you'll like it here. It's a whimsical place, full of rants, musings, and random nothingness. Why, people who live here can say pretty much anything they want, any time they want, without fear of reprisal! Can you say "fear of reprisal"? I thought you could.

[knock, knock]

Oh my, I think there's someone at the door. Let's see who it is, shall we? Okay.

[sound of door opening]

Why look, it's Mr. McBiley, the neighborhood curmudgeon. He's a perfect example of the unregulated freedom we have here in Mr. Blogger's neighborhood. Do you have a blog to share with us today, Mr. McBiley?

Mr. McBiley: #@!$ you, you #@!$ing w#nker #@!$squatting #@!$bending #@!$milking #@!$tardwearing #@!$burglar...

[sound of door slamming]

Whoa-ho-ho! Mr. McBiley's in rare form today, wouldn't you say, boys and girls? Can you say "#@!$tardwearing"? I thought you could. Mercy. Mr. Blogger can only take so much of Mr. McBiley in one day.

What do you say we take the magic Segway on over to the neighborhood of F.U.D. to wash the conceptual taste of Mr. McBiley's fully-sanctioned, constitutionally-protected foulness out of our collective metaphorical mouths, shall we? Can you say "collective metaphorical mouths"? I thought you could.

[ding, ding; ding, ding]

Well, boys and girls, here we are in the neighborhood of F.U.D., where bloggers who have some expertise in a technical area get to act like that expertise translates into the realms of politics, economics, and social planning! Let's all point our collective aggregators over this way, shall we?

Blogger One: As you know, Blogger Two, because I have some expertise in writing large-scale, service-aspected, distributed-transactional J2EE hoozy-widgets, I feel perfectly comfortable spouting off about how President Bush couldn't policy-make his way out of a boot if he were stuck at the bottom of the boot and he told his advisers to read the instructions for policy-making to him that were written on the heel of the boot. Ya know?

Blogger Two: true dat blogger one and wh@t's up w1th th3 w@y h3 t@lkz huh whut a idi0t

Blogger One: Ha, ha! You're such a #@!$tard, Blogger Two. Woot!

Well, boys and girls, Mr. Blogger is getting a little tired and needs to point his aggregator back to his own home page. Be sure to come back soon so we can whimsically muse a little, rant some more, and randomly say nothing.